Is It a Sin to Dislike Yourself? 3 Revelations That Will Change How You Think

Introduction: The Hidden Battle We All Fight

It’s a quiet, internal battle many of us fight every day: the nagging feeling of not being good enough, the persistent voice of imposter syndrome, the weight of inadequacy. We might speak words of blessing over others, believe the best about our friends and family, and yet reserve our harshest criticism for ourselves. It’s a struggle that often stays hidden, a tape of negative self-talk that plays on a loop in our minds.

Pastor Ed Newton, lead pastor of Community Bible Church in San Antonio, knows this battle intimately. His own journey led him through a profound struggle with anxiety and, as he shared, a moment at the end of 2023 when he "didn't want to live anymore" due to extreme depression—a crisis that culminated a roughly two-year journey of truly internalizing this message. It was from this crucible of hardship that he forged a message of radical, God-given confidence. His experience lends an undeniable authenticity to his insights.

This article distills three of the most surprising and impactful ideas from Pastor Newton’s message, shared during a podcast discussion about his book, Why Not You? These are not simple self-help tips; they are profound spiritual shifts that challenge us to stop believing the lies we tell ourselves and start believing what God believes about us.

Takeaway 1: Believing You're Not Good Enough Might Be a Sin

This idea is arresting and deeply counter-intuitive. We tend to view self-doubt and low self-esteem as psychological hurdles or personality flaws. Pastor Newton challenges this notion by reframing it as a spiritual issue. He shares a pivotal conversation with a friend and new believer, Cameron Beckman, who asked him a question that "wrecked" him.

"Is it a sin to not believe what God believes about you?"

After a moment of stunned silence, Newton concluded that the answer is yes. If we actively choose to reject what God, in His perfect truth, says about us—that we are loved, chosen, and created with purpose—we are essentially saying God is not right. This rejection, Newton reasons, is a declaration that God is not right. This doubt becomes a lack of faith, and a lack of faith is, by definition, a sin. It moves the conversation from "I feel bad about myself" to "I am rejecting God's truth about myself."

The concept is "wrecking" because it elevates our self-perception from a personal struggle to a matter of faith. Newton illustrates this with a powerful parent-child analogy. Many parents have looked at a child struggling with confidence and thought, "I just wish I could give you my confidence to believe what I believe." In the same way, God the Father looks at us and, through the indwelling Holy Spirit, offers us His divine confidence. Newton concludes with a sobering question: When God has given us the Holy Spirit to impart His very own confidence, how long will we choose to "quench and grieve the spirit" by refusing to believe what He says is true?

Takeaway 2: Your Greatest Setback Can Become Your Sharpest Weapon

We all have "Why me?" moments—the trials, failures, and hardships we never signed up for. We ask God why we have to walk through anxiety, face a divorce, or endure a painful past. Pastor Newton clarifies that you don't arrive at a place of purpose without first walking through the fire. The painful "Why me, God?" moments are what prepare us to later ask a different, faith-filled question: "God, you're going to use somebody to do great things, why not me?"

Newton uses the story of David and Goliath to create a powerful analogy. David, a shepherd boy, defeats the giant not with his own sword, but with Goliath's. After felling him with a stone, David uses the giant’s own massive weapon to finish the job. The application is profound: the very thing the enemy intended to use to destroy you can become the sharpest weapon in your arsenal.

"what the enemy takes against you is actually... I'm going to now use this to defeat the enemy with the weapon of what tried to take me out."

This reframes personal history not as a source of shame, but as the very training ground that forges a unique spiritual authority. Your past mistake, your season of depression, your painful story—these are not just scars to be hidden. They are the sword you can now wield to help others and defeat the enemy's plans. This is exactly how Newton now views his own battle with anxiety and depression. What was once a source of immense pain has become the very tool he uses to help others "live another day. Fight another day."

Takeaway 3: Your Internal Monologue Is a Matter of Spiritual Importance

How seriously do you take the words you say to yourself? For many, negative self-talk is just background noise. Pastor Newton argues that it is a critical spiritual discipline to manage it. He highlights this with a "punch in the gut" observation from the introduction to his book:

"And if you're honest, you may have never spoken the negative words you're spoken over yourself to anyone not even your worst enemy."

This isn't about pop psychology or a "self-help mindset." It's about recognizing that our internal voice must align with the character and voice of God. Since Scripture tells us "there is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus" (Romans 8:1), and that every good gift comes from the Father of lights, then we must conclude that the voice of condemnation and negativity we hear in our heads is not from Him. If God would never speak to you that way, why do you believe it's okay to speak to yourself that way?

This realization can be a lifelong journey. In a moment of humble transparency, Newton admits that it took him until he was almost 48 years old to truly grasp this principle. His admission is an encouragement that it’s never too late to start renewing our minds and refusing to partner with an internal voice that contradicts the loving voice of our Creator.

Conclusion: What If God Is Right About You?

These three takeaways invite us to a radical shift in perspective. They call us to treat unbelief in God's view of ourselves as a serious spiritual matter, to see our deepest wounds as the source of our greatest strength, and to relentlessly police our self-talk until it aligns with the truth of a God who does not condemn. This isn't about mustering up self-confidence, but about resting in a God-confidence that says He didn't make a mistake when He made you.

It's a journey of unlearning the lies and relearning the truth. The next time you hear that familiar voice of inadequacy, that whisper that you aren't qualified or worthy, what if you chose to answer it with a simple, faith-filled question: "God is going to use somebody... why not me?"

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